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Monday, September 05, 2011
The Acceptable Assumption
Exhaustion is actually a very frustrating but valuable friend to me.
Or so I found out.
I have a tendency to jump right in and organize (control). This came in SOOOO handy when it came to our massive yard renovation. Little did I know that things would get so out of control, and the exhaustion would take over the reigns, giving me... space... and peace.
Such a hard one of the Four Agreements sometimes.
Don't Make Assumptions. I have to be perfectly honest and say that had I not made assumptions about things that were and were NOT happening to get our yard completed, things simply would have fallen apart, gone wrong or would have to be fixed or redone (that happened anyway).
But I drew this card above... DISCERN the truth. Discern. Seems like discerning the truth and making assumptions can share a grey area. If you're perfectly balanced and not emotionally sucked into what's happening, it's likely very easy to decide if you are discerning or assuming. But in the chaos of our yard with electricians, plumbers, gas-people, lock smiths, carpenters, engineers, welders, landscapers and steel fabricators in the mix... well, let's just say after a few months, my knee-jerk reaction from experience became making assumptions. Often I was right. Once in a while, not so much.
What I learned... is that... making assumptions is going to happen. It's even necessary, in my opinion I know that flies in the face of The Four Agreements, but I think it's just word semantics that make it seem that way. DISCRENMENT of the situation and facts. Or even... discerning whether the assumptions are clouded by emotional assumptions. That would have helped me even that much more.
Eventually, I became so exhausted that I just "let go" a bit. And when mistakes happened, I jumped on them to resolve. But letting go helped me be more peaceful. Exhaustion can extinguish drama as well. The less assumptions I made, the more peaceful I was. Though it didn't always prevent scenarios that might have been avoided if I'd made the assumptions. I mean let's face it, after someone disappoints you 3 times in a row, you're going to assume they'll do it again. And I was right, mostly. The emotional attachment to it is hard to avoid. So sometimes I assumed incorrectly. The less balanced I am, the more likely I am to assume incorrectly.
Discernment. How emotionally upset or fired up am I? That's often an indicator as to how accurate my discernment (assumption) is.
I hope I can remember this the next time. Discernments are just balanced assumptions. These kinds of assumptions are to be utilized ever so sparingly, by double-checking my emotional attachement and judgement of the person/situation.
~Shephard :)
posted by Shephard @ 